Monday 21st May

Yesterday I met my mum in town, so we could do a little shopping for my late birthday present =)

I used some money from my other half to buy myself a nice new dress and a pair of new sunglasses as mine got broken =(
They're well cool, they've got butterflies on =)

I got a new dress, 2 new tops and 2 new pairs of leggings.. ALL in my favorite colour: BLUE!!!

Sooo chuffed with them all, they will all go with each other!
woopwoop

I had a lovely time, the only thing that spoilt it was my trip up the doctors ;)
Because now I am 25 I've had to have my Cervical Screening Test done.. BOOHOO!! It wasn't as bad as I thought especially as I knew what to expect with the speculum as I had one used when I had the ectopic 2 years ago. I didn't know what to expect really from having this done as I've never had it and no one has ever spoke to me about it and no one gave me a proper explination!
If anyone is due to have one, I would advise going.. There is nothing to be afraid of, I know, because I did it.. Didn't think I would, but I did =)

I then went back to a couple of shops and spent a little bit more money, and then we went into the pub in the town called Hatters.. Where we had a drink and a natter, whilst I was coughing to death from my cold, and sneezing and blowing my nose - soo embarrassing!!
But it was nice to see my brother for a little while.. Even though he was supposed to give me something for my birthday.. I now have to wait till next week! Ruined my chances of getting 2 pitchers for £10 in Hatters!
Even so, I had a good evening..

Chilled out with my cat and other half watching a bit of telly.. Watched the last episode of the season for Two and A Half Men.. Had to wipe back a tear, but I am soooo glad they're back in the Autumn (Fall) with their new season.. Season 10 I do believe

*** YAAAY ***

The First Step To Changes...

Today i had my appointment at our local mental health center..

Had bit of a restless night, but still managed to get up.. well stay awake this morning lol
I had a few tears and panics before i left, but i managed to get there, in the end!! (i got my brother to meet me and walk me around to the place)
The meeting wasn't too bad, i had a lady whom is new to the profession, and wanted to sit in with me and use me as her project i guess.. i was reluctant at first, but until i was told that it would be extra help and support, i thought well i might as well.. plus i am a tough lil cookie with so much going on.. that i would be a good subject lol just hope that i dont put her off her career :p teehee
After she was introduced to me, we went through a mini questionnaire thing, to point out how much something bothers me, and what is desperate and needs to be looked at.
I don't remember much on this list now, unfortunately :(
but i do know that the most important subjects were
- self harm
- tension release
- sleeping
- anger management
..and quite a few more...
I was asked if i wished to start looking into the program today, but i felt that after the interview as they say that i felt bit full of information and talked all i needed to talk about and left it at that.

I now go to the Bedale Center once a week.. going on a Wednesday afternoon at 2pm.. i start my first session next week. they are going to be easy on me, mind you they'd have to - i not very good with pressure etc. so i would need to start off small..
So next week's session will start talking about sleeping - as thats driving me mad as i cannot sleep and i have been like it for 2 to 3 months now even before i took the anti depressants!!!
I talked about sleeping tablets and how the ones i took the other day "NatraSleep" and the effect they gave me..
So who knows what'll happen!!

But after the session, my brother came and met me again, and then i went back to dads flat with him, and then watched him and his girlfriend playing on the playstation 3 and then finally dragged my brothers arse into town!! lol
I wanted to have a look at external hard drives as my laptop drive is only 100GB and i want bit more space than that externally so i dont keep clogging up my laptop itself as it slows it down all the time.. drives me mad!!
** i hope i didnt embarrass him too much lol My brother should realise that when someone takes ME out its "Special Sammii's Day Out" - like the people that look after special needs peoples.. hehe thats what it like for meeee... so i kept going ooooooh POKEMON and WOW and OMG .. etc! ha ha ha **
All i bought in town in the end was a new art book, as i lost my other one at my house somewhere :( and then a few bits in morrisons..
did a little bit of shopping, mind you most of the shopping was chocolate for meeeeeee =)
i bought:
a pack of 2 doughnuts - they didnt have the custard ones :( so got 2 raspberry ones! lol
2 x kitkat caramel was on off 2 for 70p!!
box of maltesers as was £1
cheapo custard creams
crinkle and thin chips
and curly fries =) yay

Not bad really lol although i shouldnt eat all that really.. i will get fat.....!! ha ha ha ha (NEVER)